Even When I Just Don't Feel Like It

Boy was today a hot one! Even now, at 9:20PM, it's 97° outside. Tomorrow won't be any better; as a matter of fact, it's going to be worse (according to the forecast anyway). After some personal training, taking kids to doctor appointments, doing some grocery shopping, and other mommy duties, I was spent. It seems that every time I got into my car, those black leather seats sucked a little more energy out of me. The suffocating heat was just almost more than I could take.
Before all of this, I just knew what my workout plan was. I needed to get my cardio in as well as a good shoulder/chest workout. The strength training was the easy part; that's the stuff I enjoy. I must admit, had I known how hot it was going to be in the gym, I may have talked myself right out of it. By the time the workout was over, my youngest child (who'd been going with me to my in-home personal training appointments and on my errands) had been in the childcare room for about an hour. I knew I needed to get my sweet Sophie home so that she could enjoy herself. There was still the cardio that needed to be done... Perhaps I'd get a nap in first. And so I took a nap. When I woke up, I found myself finding every excuse to not head out again. I was tired, I had cleaning to do, I wanted to relax with my kids, it's hot outside, there's that reading assignment for my literature class... You name the excuse and chances are I'd come up with it. For nearly an hour, I was telling myself all of the reasons that I could get away with not going to the gym. At the same time, in the back of my mind, those extra post-competition binge pounds were saying, "Come on! You don't really want me hanging around with you all summer, do you?" And so I went. I quit procrastinating just in time to make it to the last spin class of the day. It wasn't until about fifteen minutes into the class that I was glad I'd made it. Frankly, I just didn't feel like going before that. After those first few minutes of spinning, my heart was pumping and I found myself singing along to the songs that were blaring out in that hot, little room. Some great HIIT focused moments made the class totally worthwhile. I felt strong, clear-minded, and energized.
It's crazy how that works, isn't it? Almost every week, at some point in time, at least one of my clients will either forget, oversleep, or psyche themselves out of their workout with me. It's more normal for my clients to answer with a resounding "No" when I ask if they'd gone to the gym or done some physical activity between our appointments. They're tired, overwhelmed, hot, discouraged, depressed, or just not in the mood for it. Goodness, I used to be the same way. Frankly, it's the reason most people I know aren't reaching their fitness goals. They want the prize at the end of the finish line, but they just don't feel like running the race. Believe me, I know how that feels because I've been there-done that way too many times to count.
What I'm going to say, I've said many times before. I believe that when people do this it's because they do not believe that they are worth the time, effort, and sacrifice it takes to be as healthy and fit as they would like to be. Think about it for a minute or two. Would you hesitate for a minute if your neighbor or friend asked you to help watch their child for a day or to help them move? Do you feel guilty saying "no" to the boss who requests you work a little longer or come in a little earlier even though you'll be exhausted if you do so? Are you the first to volunteer to be "Team Dad or Mom" or to organize the weekly carpool? Do you indulge the chatty friend who just doesn't know when to end a conversation on the phone or as you walk by and find that before you know it, you've been chatting it up for an hour or more? Personally, I can relate. For years, I gave and sacrificed for all of those important things while neglecting my own health and needs. It caught up with me. I found myself tired, sick, and crabby. The very people I was sacrificing for were getting the worst of me. It was not until I realized that I'm worth the effort and time it takes to be more physically fit that I learned to make this a priority. What's your story?

When Procrastination Comes to Visit

As I sit here writing, I'm struggling a bit. Not with energy, not with discouragement, not with sadness or anger... I'm struggling with distraction. I've got zillions of things going through my head. Will I get the kids' rooms cleaned before they get home from their dad's? What time should I wake up tomorrow to get to the gym so that I can shower and still get to church on time? Why haven't I started on that essay that's due tomorrow by midnight? Do the kids miss me? Oh no, we're running out of groceries; I'd better get to the store before the kids get home Wednesday! Should I walk the dog now or in an hour? Could I steal some lazy time and watch Friday Night Lights (the finale is recorded-why did that show have to end?)? What's that smell? Probably something in the gargage. I'd better take that out. How long will it take to lose the binge weight and can I safely do that without losing the strength gains I'm working toward for next competition season? I probably spent too much money at Marshalls on those new workout shirts; they are nice though. Only 9.99 for a 35.00 shirt ain't too bad---unless you buy five of them. Am I nutty for thinking about all of this instead of focusing on that paper I'm supposed to be writing?

Do you ever have moments like that? Usually, what keeps me from getting the studying or schoolwork done when I want to get it done is overwhelming fatigue, not a flood of unrelated distracting thoughts. The feeling that I have so much to do and so little time to do it seems to invite my good old friend, Procrastination, into my home. She's sitting right here on the couch with me, thanking me for such a comfy place to spend the evening. I guess there are times that it seems easier to procrastinate than settle on that one thing that absolutely must get done.

So, why am I writing about this on a blog that is related to fitness? Well, when talking to clients who feel stuck or defeated when it comes to reaching their goals, I often hear similar things come from them. They feel like they just can't focus on their diet or on their workouts because there's just too much to get done. Further discussion usually brings some clarity to the situation, regardless of how complicated it all is. Most of the time, my clients will share with me that they're bombarded with the needs of work, their children, their husbands, etc. Sometimes, they're just frozen like I am now. They will find one excuse after the other to cancel an appointment with me, to splurge on just one more piece of pizza (like I did last night), or just throw in the towel altogether. I've actually had clients who've paid me hundreds of dollars for several sessions, knowing it's non-refundable and give up after only two or three sessions because "This is just all overwhelming to me right now." That's when I say, "Come on. Let's get going. Are you worth this or not?" You just cannot stay in that frozen state and expect to achieve anything at all. If you want a degree (like I do), eventually you've got to get to work. If you want to lose some weight, you've got to get moving and make the edible changes that don't take a rocket scientist to figure out. If you don't know what to do, ask someone who does. You really are worth it! There's not a single reason that any of us should be sitting around on our bums feeling sorry for ourselves for not being where we want to be in life. We have so many resources at our disposal to help us reach the goals that we want to reach that most excuses are really not worth even voicing.

Roadblocks? Yes, they absolutely do exist. Sometimes, you can actually get around them or climb over them. Disappointingly, there are times that the roadblocks cannot be passed or climbed over. So, if you're are honestly giving it your all to reach the goals that you've set for yourself and one of those gigantic roadblocks is in your way, drop to your knees and ask God if your heart is set on the right kind of goals that He wants you to have. You may find that reaching your goals would put you in a place that would hinder you from being the person God designed you to be. If that's the case, it's not a failure; it's merely a redirection. You may be unwittingly headed to Timbuktu instead of the Promised Land.

Now, let's say you had a roadblock and you got to the other side of it. Chances are you learned something along the way of that difficult, burdensome journey. Don't keep it to yourself. Who knows? You may just be providing someone with the inspiration they need to climb over some monster-sized hurdles in their own lives. I can't tell you how many times someone has openly shared a past or present struggle that they worked through which inspired me to get through something similar. Praise God for those inspirational people in my life!

Alright, off of my soapbox I go. I'm kicking Procrastination out of the house; she's eating up my productive energy. Time to walk the dog and then get this brain wrapped around some short stories by DH. Lawrence and Shirley Jackson for my literature class essay. And then, Friday Night Lights. The rest of it all will just have to wait til tomorrow. Priorities, baby....

Goals, goals, and more goals. What are yours?

It's been several months since I last posted anything on my blog. Why? Because I'm busier than a fly being chased by a swatter.

I've got only about four courses left to take before it's time for me to start considering and planning the next phase of college which is student teaching. If you're a client reading this, don't worry, I'm still training for a while. I'm not quite ready to take the leap and quit training full-time yet. When the time comes, you'll know way in advance. Before I was working so hard toward this degree, I had so much more time for my favorite at-home hobbies: reading, writing, and napping).

I'm not sure why I didn't post my figure competition prep here. Perhaps it's because of all of the time I was spending on Bodybuilding.com, Scivation.com (forums there are great for fitness and natural bodybuilding enthusiasts), working on my degree, working with clients, or catching a breather at home. Or it could be (and I'm sure this is part of it), I was a little nervous about sharing the ups and downs of the whole figure prep experience.

Now that I've gone through the hardest stages of that and am prepare for the 2012 competition season, I'm ready to share some things I've learned about myself hoping it will motivate or encourage you.

Late last summer, I made the ultimate decision to compete in an all natural figure competition. I started cleaning up my diet during the Fall and really buckled down on the diet in November. At the time, I was planning on competing in February. It only took about three or four weeks to realize that I was carrying too much bodyfat to be stage-ready. So, I set my eyes on a competition in April.

Using the knowledge base that I already had, asking experienced friends and acquaintances for guidance and constructive criticism, and stating my goals to many people put me in the right frame of mind to do what I had to do. By February 1, I had lost almost twenty pounds of bodyfat. That being said, I was starting to second-guess myself in the gym and with my diet. Was I eating too much? Was I eating too little? Should I do high intensity cardio? Should I exercise on an empty stomach? Could I drink coffee? It was starting to monopolize my thoughts, especially at bedtime. All of that second-guessing and fretting led me to realize that I needed more outside help from someone who I could trust.

Right around that time, I started posing practice with my posing coach, Tina Peratino of Centerstage Figures. At the first session, I realized just how much I needed to focus on my presentation. Tina taught me how to stand in such a way to maximize my muscular and feminine strengths. She took pictures of me posing so that I could have them for reference. Boy were those pictures a wake-up call. I still had a lot of work to do and not much time to do it. That's when I decided to contact the man who would become my training and nutrition coach, Layne Norton.

When I first contacted Layne, I really doubted he'd ever have the time or interest in getting around to contacting me back. What a shocker it was when he responded to my email within minutes of my sending it. The really crazy thing is that I think it was nearly midnight. I was seven weeks out from my very first competition and I just figured I'd waited too long for him to be willing to work with me. After telling me that he typically doesn't work with anyone less than 12 weeks out from competition, he said that I should send him my most recent progress pictures. He ended that email saying he wouldn't make any promises regarding the whole thing. Over the next few days, we emailed back and forth...he wanted to know what my diet, training, and sleep looked like, he wanted to know what kind of supplementation I was doing, etc. After a few back-and-forth emails, he agreed to work with me.

My results with Layne were immediate. I'd been "stuck" at 127lbs for weeks. At the first week, I dropped about two pounds. Seven weeks later, I stepped on stage for the first time looking as lean and as strong as I possibly could have with the amount of time I had to do it. I was the Masters champion (women ages 35+) and I brought home three 2nd place trophies.

I competed again a few weeks later in two other competitions and walked away with trophies each time. By the third competition, I was exhausted and had come down with strep throat. The surreal excitement of my accomplishments gave way to exhaustion and a surprising depressed feeling. Then there were the post competition binges. Boy did I eat, and eat, and eat....and sleep, and throw up, and get sick, and feel depressed....

Here I am two months past my first competition season, about fifteen pounds heavier, and very proud of what I've accomplished personally and professionally.

So, what's coming up next? Well, I'm looking to compete again in 2012. In the meantime, I've got a degree I am strongly pursuing, a full-time personal training business to work, five beautiful kids who need more of me, and an amazing husband to be thankful for and enjoy. So, while I'm enjoying my family and working my job like most of you work yours, I'm also growing physically. You'll see these deltoids of mine getting fuller and rounder, I may be walking funny to your personal training sessions after having given myself a beating in the gym (don't think I don't victimize myself the way I torture my clients).

The smaller, but still important goals I've got are probably similar to most of my friends. Eliminate our debts, save more, get the home better organized, spend more time with the kids individually, etc. What's important is that my goals are not the sum of who I am. I set out to be successful because I wholeheartedly believe that the successes I desire will enrich the lives of my husband, my children, and me. Are you setting goals? Have you reached the point in your life where you want to be? You're worth whatever it takes to be as healthy as you can be and at peace with your life. Love you for the person that you were designed to be. Live every day like it matters because you matter!

where have I been?

The last time I posted here, I was near the beginning of contest preparation for my very first figure competition. Weighing in at nearly 140lbs, I was ready to lean down and see what I could do competitively.

The journey was long, tiring, exciting, enlightening, motivating, enriching, and fulfilling. More to come. What I will say before closing is that a new journey has begun. I'm aiming for a pro card now!

Just Do...Something

Do you feel discouraged because, once again, you've let that New Year Resolution to get in shape slip away from you? Do you have a pair of "dream pants" that you've been keeping in the back of the closet that you just can't squeeze into? Have you found yourself avoiding the camera at family gatherings because you feel that you look bloated in pictures? You're no alone. Very often, when people learn that I'm a personal trainer, they will say, "Gretchen, I just can't seem to lose the weight. What can I do?" When I inquire about their lifestyle choices, I typically learn that they've truly not been making the lifestyle choices necessary to reach their goals. Usually, it's their overworked, busy schedules causing this. Sometimes, it's because they find themselves slowly drifting back to the old lifestyle patterns even after a short period of fitness success.

Something that saddens me a bit is when I see people, especially women, beating themselves up emotionally opver their struggle with weight. Once we allow that depth of discouragement get the best of us, it is easy to give up. So, I'd like to encourage you to reach your fitness goals in a way that is not overwhelming. What I often recommend is that you just do SOMETHING. Start by writing down or discussing your fitness goals with someone you are close to. Once you have set these goals, telling someone will help you stay accountable. If you have health concerns, then the first "something" you should do is to see your doctor and discuss any restrictions or recommendations he/she may have for you so that you can safely get on the road to better health.

When my personal training clients seem overwhelmed by the many new changes I may recommend, I often suggest that they make two lifestyle changes a week which will improve their health and to journal what those changes are. For example, the first week may include drinking the recommended amount of water and taking a walk twice a week. The following week, that same person may get rid of processed food in the house and pack healthy food to take with them to work. For many, trying to do too much at one time becomes overwhelming. Can you imagine what kinds of positive changes you can experience in one month with just two lifestyle changes a week. Within a month, you may very well find that you have lost a dress of pants size because you're finally drinking the water your body needs, you're incorporating strength training into your weekly routine, you're taking walks in your community, your family is getting used to eating vegetables every evening, etc.

Whatever you do, don't let discouragement stop you from being the healthiest, fittest you that you can be. I'm sure that you can do it! If you're an "all or nothing" type of person, perhaps this approach won't work for you. If you find that your tendency is to, time and again, fall short of your fitness goals, perhaps this approach will work for you. Remember, if you'reding nothing to reach your goals now, doing SOMETHING is a big step.

Best wishes in all that you hope to accomplish! Remember, you are worth the effort it takes to get healthier.

Hello 2010

Here I am, writing on my blog over a year after my last post. So much has changed in a year. Last I wrote, I'd just had knee surgery to clean up my patella (knee cap). I wasn't quite into a good groove when it comes to working out and I wasn't sure how I was going to get myself up to par; although, I was positive I could still train effectively. In many ways, I was vicariously living through their successes as I recuperated. I have to admit, that was the beginning of a dry spell when it comes to being where I needed to be to fully focus on my own fitness.

It seems that during that time, I was at the beginning of biting off more than I could chew. My appetite for serving, bettering myself, reaching personal goals, and achieving elite fitness was insatiable. I was working on my degree, recuperating from knee surgery, beginning to feel the effects of a slowing economy as clients started backing off of training, and was a bit overwhelmed by it all. I guess you could say that I was caught between where I was wanting to be and where I needed to be. Within a few months, I took a second job and intended to phase out my personal training to focus on what I still to this day believe is the best thing (for women anyway) since sliced bread. That's the ingenious creation of my sister-in-law, Staci Berner. She developed the Shapeez Unbelievabra (check it out at www.shapeez.com). By Spring, I was working for Staci and David (Staci's husband/my brother-in-law), Monday-Friday as Staci's personal assistant and the primary Customer Care person. What a great place to work! Drama-free atmosphere, great bosses, and a team of women (and David) all working together on the best new thing for women. I can't deny that it was a rewarding experience!

Unfortunately, I was trying to "do it all" as they say...do the full-time working mom thing which included working for Shapeez and holding on to some of my personal training, work on my degree, keep up with all of the kids' activities (did I mention there are five to keep up w/?), and somehow try to muster up the emotional energy for myself and my husband. Eventually, I tuckered myself out and became especially ill. I just couldn't recover and stayed tired.

At this point, it was apparent that I had to make a change-a few changes! One of the hardest things I had to do was leave Shapeez. It was especially difficult to tell my sister that I had to leave and focus on my personal training and family. The flexibility my life requires is just too much to be able to ask of any employer, especially one that I love so much! It was also difficult to truly believe in myself enough as a business woman to re-enter personal training full-time. Thankfully, my loving husband, my children, and the clients that I still held onto encouraged me. I even remember my big brother, Tony, calling me when I was sick and saying, "Gretchen, you can't keep doing that. This is going to bite you in the ***." My parents were worried about me. My mom and dad would lovingly express their concern that I was not taking care of myself. And my sweet husband....Elon was doing such an amazing job, holding down the fort here at home, but he really missed me. Little by little, I could see Elon's need for more time with me here at home. So, it was a no-brainer. I had to make the change and it was not going to be easy.

Once I wrapped my mind around what I needed to do, I prayerfully weighed every step of every day and every word of every conversation. I wanted to be sure that, as hard as it would be, my heart was in the right place. What a blessing it has been since!

Here I am back to what I need to be doing! My training schedule is starting to fill again. I'm working on my degree again (at my own pace thanks to online opportunities), and the kids have a mom who isn't tuckered out. Elon and I have been able to have "us" again.

So, 2010 is being met with new goals:
1. Get my home organized so that it is peaceful for us all.
2. Get my workouts in no less than 5 days a week.
3. Book my schedule so that I am training/teaching classes no less than 20 sessions a week.
4. Give each kid no less than 1 hour of "mom and me" time each week.
5. Spend quality alone time with my husband as much as possible.
6. Keep my GPA (3.75).

More goals to come! What are your goals?